Clemson 2011 Football Predictions

August 19, 2011

You might not be aware of this, but woohooing during Tiger Rag sounds awful. Stop it.




Here's a quick rundown of what's going to happen this football season:


Week 1: Troy Trojans
Clemson wins, but it will be a more stressful game for me than it should be.

Clemson: 1-0


Week 2: Wofford Terriers
Easy Clemson win

Clemson: 2-0


Week 3: Auburn
Before the 2010 season, I said Clemson would lose at Auburn, and they did. Not this year. Clemson squeaks by a drastically depleted Auburn.

Clemson 3-0


Week 4: Florida State
With stellar recruiting and a coaching change, the Noles appear to have regained their swagger (ask Marcus Lattimore). FSU’s offensive line will plow Clemson’s defensive line after the first quarter, and Kevin Steele still has not demonstrated that he has an answer for mobile quarterbacks like EJ Manuel. Clemson loses, and I just hope it doesn’t get ugly for the Tigers.

Clemson 3-1




Week 5: at Virginia Tech
Interesting game here between Chad Morris and Bud Foster. I think Clemson will lose either way, but if it is a night game, Clemson might be embarrassed.


Clemson 3-2


Week 6: Boston College
This game will be a surprising shootout, as you don’t normally think of Boston College as a scoring machine. However, Clemson only has two defensive tackles to play against an always stout BC offensive line. This will allow Montel Harris to run wild, if he’s healthy. BC likes to stay in their base 4-3 defense, and I don’t think that’ll work against Chad Morris’s offense. Clemson wins.

Clemson 4-2


Week 7: at Maryland
It’s hard to call this one right now since Maryland has a new coach. I think Randy Edsall beat Soccer Liner in a bowl a couple of years ago at UConn, so he might be dangerous. I’ll mark this one down as Clemson’s annual lay-a-turd game. Clemson loss.

Clemson 4-3


Week 8: UNC
The Tarheels still have some ballers on defense, but Death Valley and a new UNC coaching staff equals a Clemson win.

Clemson 5-3


Week 9: at Gimmick Tech Yellow Bees
I hate, hate, hate to say this, but Clemson’s shallow defensive tackle depth will really bite them in this game. Gimmick Tech’s B-back might have a monster game. Clemson loses.

Clemson 5-4


Week 11: Wake Forest
I haven’t worried about Wake Forest since Bowden was on the side line. Clemson wins.

Clemson 6-4


Week 12: at NC State
I don’t know much about NC State this year, except they’ll have a new quarterback. Let’s say Clemson wins.

Clemson 7-4


Week 13: at Soccer Liner Chickens
Oh boy, this is not going to be a good offseason for Clemson fans. My chicken friends might as well pop the champagne because Clemson will not stop Soccer Liner for an uncharacteristic third straight year. During last year’s game, I made Mel hide my phone from me. It will be the same story this year, because if I have my phone during this game, I will certainly put something on Facebook that nobody wants to read.

Clemson 7-5